Good For Joints And Poops And Attitude

These Zesty Paws treats receive a ton of positive reviews on Amazon. And we mean A TON! Seriously, some of these varieties have more than 35,000 ratings. That’s even more than a Blissbulbs projector, if you can believe it!

But what does that mean, exactly? Like, really, does the fact that some dog treats are highly rated indicate they’re, you know, good? Like, they are for dogs. And dogs are not the most discerning group of gourmands to walk the earth. Sure, their palates can have quirks, but those quirks don’t often correspond to a given food’s quality.

And yet, most dog owners know this, so they’re not about to go through the whole rigamarole of logging into Amazon and posting their thoughts if said thoughts amount to little more than, “I gave him one and he ate it, and then I gave him another and he ate that one too!” After all, if “my dog willfully chewed this right up” were enough to inspire people to write reviews of stuff, they’d have a lot of things to review, some of them not intended to be eaten, others of them outright hazardous to be eaten.

So what is it then? What earns these things such high ratings on such a high number of reviews?

It’s simple: they work.

Here’s what user Cathey Randolph says about the Mobility Bites:

My 10 year old dog Tallulah started limping for 3 days, as her left hip was bothering her. I tried these because they helped my sister’s pit bull mix. Tallulah is finicky but really liked the flavor. I liked the near immediate improvement I saw in her gait and ability to get up and down on the furniture. Her pain diminished in 6 hours! One of these a day is a bargain for improved mobility and pain relief!

And here’s what Gloria Murray says about the Probiotic Bites:

My dogs absolutely love these probiotics. They look forward to one every morning. They help with healthy digestion and that’s exactly what my elderly pets need. They have healthy poops and no longer suffer from digestion issues like the loud rumbling and bloatedness. I’m very happy with this product and I’ve been giving them to my dogs for years.

(Healthy poops, just to be clear, are solid poops, and that should be enough to make certain pet owners buy these without a second thought. Because seriously, is there anything worse than being out for a walk and having your dog pop a squat to release some vile soft-serve sludge? Even forgetting a bag isn’t as bad; you just accept the fact that you’re a criminal and run away. When it’s soft, you have to make an effort and dear god is that effort GROSS!)

Oh, and BTW, these are not cherry-picked reviews. Scroll around on any one of these products and you’ll see thousands of people saying more-or-less the same thing.

So, go ahead, get some dog treats that’ll actually improve your dog’s health. (Assuming you have a dog, that is; it would be weird if you bought these and didn’t have a dog.)